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Earlier this week we had a night of high winds and freezing rain. I was awakened in the middle of the night by the power going off. How the sudden silence of the house could wake me up, I don't know, but it did.
Richard was sleeping in the spare room because he had to get up earlier than me, so I went upstairs with a flashlight to be sure there were no fallen trees or anything else (other than ice and wind) causing the outage. Jonathan woke up too, and wanted to get up, but since it was 4:15 (slightly earlier than I'd intended to get up for the day), I was able to persuade him back to bed.
photo: The Weather Network
I lay there in the darkness and my mind immediately started racing, imagining and planning what would happen if the power wasn't on by morning. The gas fireplace would turn on, so we'd have some warmth. We could light the gas stove burners with a barbecue lighter and heat water for coffee, even toast bread in a frying pan. How many times would we need to open the fridge to cobble breakfast together? What if the power was off at Jonathan's school, though: he'd have to stay home, and I had a (rare) meeting on campus at 11 that I couldn't miss. But what if power was off on campus too? My mind was swirling at top speed.
Somehow these racing thoughts calmed themselves, and I must have fallen asleep, because I was suddenly awakened again by the bedroom lights coming on. Jonathan must have flicked the light switch on when he came in earlier to investigate what was happening. It was 5:15. I turned the lights off, got back into bed with a sigh of relief, and slept.
That wasn't the first time I'd lain awake in the middle of the night, with thoughts and worries swirling through my mind. I wish every time it happened, problems would be obliterated by a sudden burst of light -- but that usually doesn't happen. Most of the time answers are harder to come by, so I wait, wonder, and try to trust.
We have had some pretty high winds and heavy rains here as well, Jeannie. I too have been wakened in the middle of the night by the howling and pelting. Sometimes I've found it hard to get back to sleep. When that happens, I try to say a simple prayer, "Lord, help me get back to sleep. You know I need my rest." Often that is all it takes :)
ReplyDeleteYou're so right, Susan. My tendency is more, "Lord, I'm just going to organize a few hundred details in my mind here first, if that's OK, and then You can help me get back to sleep." :-)
DeleteWhy is it that the middle of the night (in the dark) is when we are most often consumed by anxious thoughts? Reading about Jonathan flipping on the lights, made me think of how God is light and how he always overcomes darkness. No matter how dark it gets in our lives, His light is waiting to break through. Glad we connected today on #FiveMinuteFriday
ReplyDeleteMe too, Jennifer - thanks for commenting, and blessings on your family. I really like your point about God being the true light. I suppose if I had had ten minutes instead of five, I could've unpacked that further, but I'm already wordy enough that five is a real challenge for me!
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Middle can be a hard place. Before and after are a lot easier for me to handle when it comes to difficult times. You convincing Jonathan to go back to bed is a metaphor for the little victories that sustain when we're in the middle of those trying times.
ReplyDeleteThat's true, Tim -- although the fact that I let him sleep in OUR bed probably had something to do with it. :-) And I agree -- before and after can be easier. The middle can be very, very messy.
DeleteI can relate to middle of the night awakenings and wonderings. It can be so hard to rest our minds and sleep. Thank you for sharing your words. I'm so glad you are part of the FMF community.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mary; this is a new thing for me in 2017 and I am really enjoying it so far. Thanks for reading and commenting -- take care.
Delete:) Lucky you! My day starts at 4 most mornings! When I wake up in the middle of the night, I start praying for family members and anyone else who's name pops into my mind. I usually fall peacefully back asleep.
ReplyDeleteGood for you, blestbutstrest! Thanks for sharing.
DeleteI'm glad you were able to fall asleep. Middle of the nights can be the worst. Or maybe they are middle of the mornings, rather. :) Love that last line!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Christina - I'm happy you stopped by and thanks for reading my book post, too! It's really nice to connect in these linkups.
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